Due to popular demand (and a strong warning from my wife including the words: "couch", "dog house", "below zero weather"), I have decided to always wear hunters orange. Yelp – that's me – the model of modern man in orange camo.

(Note from The Editor: Please note that my client's wife did not say any of the above words or making any known threats. My client has a history of mental instability and manufactures conversations within his mind. In other words, Em – please to not be upset with my client as he knows not what he does. Thank you.)

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