Enchanted: A Movie Review

Wow! I never knew there was a movie so cute or mushy in existence! We started the film during supper – which was a bad idea as I almost threw up in the first 5 minutes of flick!

I mean – the producers took EVERY single cute, mushy, girly, romantic, cheesy or other-wise unbelievable Disney and crammed them into the first 15 minutes!!! (don't believe me? check it out here) It was enough to make any guy go stir crazy!!! I wouldn't say that I was a stereotypically guy – come on, I cried Gilpin sacrificed himself in The Dirty Dozen – but Enchanted was way, WAY over the top.

Now remember – this all happened within the first 15 to 20 minutes… of a 107 minute movie!

Despite my repeated threats of leaving to hang sheetrock, I stayed – mostly because Em, who seen the film before (read: "SHE LOVED IT"), said there where some good parts ahead. As it turned out, the "good parts" were a reference to the wicked queen pushing Giselle down a well.

At this point, the film takes a drastic change. No longer is it a 2D cartoon, but a live action film set in New York City. The main point being that only in NYC could someone wonder around in a large white dress or a 1500's princely garb and not getting any strange looks. Well – maybe not any strange looks… but not many.

I can’t even begin to express the horror of the films innocence or the lack of logic that was expressed as the minutes ran on. (I'm so glad we didn't see this movie in the theaters as my sister-in-law wanted to… the terror of that kind of torture is unspeakable!)

[@more@]It was after the happy-go-lucky park song, "That's How You Know" (which was Em's favorite), that I had enough. If I was going to make it through this film, I needed a stiff drink. Badly. And it better be stiff.

After a few sips of Glenlivet, the film got a bit better. A bit, mind you. I was through the love of a women that I continued on my brave quest to salvage the male reputation.

Now before all you women readers start mailing rotten tomatoes to me, please know that I did enjoy certain parts of the film.

The parts with the chipmunk were especially funny. I about DIED laughing as Pip tried to talk or, the best part, when he holds up his belly and steps onto the dragon. That was classic!!! Oh, I'm lucky to be alive after that bit!!! ROFL

Which brings me to a mind bending question: If the evil queen dragon creature had wings, why did it/she fall?



PS> Note to the guys, Enchanted is pure brownie points (if you can get through it) Wink